Monday, November 27, 2006

Beauty or a beast?


Hi loveys! I hope you guys missed me! I missed you all terrible. Hopefully, I’ll be back on track from this week and back to my mad-ass machinations and pissed postings like normal. So my post today is this. I have a friend who, over a year now, getting track by this man. Now, the fella, how to put this delicately…. he ogly. But he’s very kind, very giving, understanding, loving and generous. He has a good business sense and owns several pieces of property, several cars, has his own business etc. In other words, he eh scrunting. If ever she’s in any sort of need, he will do whatever it takes to help her out, whether it’s cold medicine when she’s sick, a box of food when she’s hungry or money if she’s broke. She likes him – they’re good friends – but I think she’s embarrassed to be more than his friend. Now, the fella really fall on the unfortunate side of handsome eh, but I think after a while she might start to find him attractive because of the beauty of his personality. I think she’s ashamed of what her friends and family might say, as she’s accustomed to being with “good looking” guys. I put good-looking in quotes because none of these guys were good looking in my book but she did find so. So my question to you guys is this, if you were in this situation, what would you choose? Would you put aside personal preferences and fatigue from family and friends and go with a man that was physically unattractive but a good friend and an otherwise ideal mate or, not?

29 comments:

Icahwait* said...

Morning Hotts,

Depends on how ugly. Because if there is no physical attraction whatsoever then it just ain't go work. At the end of the day she's going to have to kiss and get inbetween the sheets if she's going to be in a relationship. How's she going to do the rest?
His personality will have to outshine EVERYTHING so much that the attraction will come naturally if its meant to be
Personality is great and it should be mostly about that not trying to be superficious. But if you can't look the man dead in his eye...???

Hottie Hottie said...

LOL!!!!!!! Well, I guess she could look him in de eye cuz dey always liming! But I know what you mean.

Carnival Jumbie said...

I sorry, I have to think about my kids. I doh want my child to be the "ugly kid" in school and be terrrorised and teased all their life cause they take after their father. I would not want to put them through that. As unfortunate as it is, better looking ppl tend to do better in today's superficial world and I only want the best for my kids so I would not call the curse of ugliness on them if I can help it.

saucydiva said...

Well normally even the "ugliest" person has something attractive, and if he is really a good person and she had an open mind I think it might be possible that she see beyond the physical. To me, physical attraction has only a small part of sexual attraction, you can be sexually attracted to someone who is "ugly" but who has a sexy voice or someone who knows exactly what to say and do to make a woman get that tingly feeling, you know those men who can charm the pants off you and you can't ketch yourself.

But, you know what is ironic Hottie, she might give this man a chance and that would just boost his ego,to the point where he feel he could get any pretty woman despite not being too good looking, and next thing yuh know he horning her! And worse yet, all the women who was watching him cut eye before, when they see him with a nice pretty chick, they want to know what he have so, what he do so to get her and they flinging theyself behind the man!

Life is a bitch I tell you.

Hottie Hottie said...

Diva - LOL! True talk. Being a ugly child in school real hard.

Saucy - That is true talk. And yuh know it will hurt more to get horn from a ugly man yuh was bussing style on than from a cute one.

Hottie Hottie said...

Anytime you lower your standards and it backfires you end up feeling like a bamcee.

saucydiva said...

Yuh know!Being with an "ugly" man doh mean you ent go get the same treatment from a "pretty" one, if anything they does work real hard upfront to get you, but you doh get to see their true colours until much too late.

Crankyputz said...

You know sometimes a man's other qualities can make him attractive. Nothing worse than a pretty boy who has nothing up there. Also looks only take you so far, as you fall for someone, the looks tend to receed into the background. But you have to have the chemistry. Also I think we girls have our priorities in a jumble. If he takes care of you, and get's you tingling, GO for it, forget people, there will always be someone who doesn't like who your with.

Hottie Hottie said...

Exactly, crankyputz. I mean, there has to be some sort of attraction yes, but does it have to be conventional attraction? I've been with good looking guys who quickly became ugly as I realised their bad ways. In the end I lost all physical attraction for them. The thing is, I think my friend may be willing to give him a chance but is afraid of what others will say. I've spoken to anotehr friend about it and she says teh same as me - at the end of the day if the man is good to you and good for you that is more important than anyting else. We really don't care if she's with him as long as she's happy.

Island Spice said...

I don't care how pretty or ugly he is.. am I attracted to him? My attraction occurs on a more primal level.. so men fall into the category of YES i would sleep with him or NO not on your life. This has much more to do with his grooming and esp his smell.. more than anything else.
So if he smells good and has other qualities I like.. then YES YES YES.
Good man hard to find. :)

law said...

First thing, even though the man is ooogly, is your friend attracted to him? There has to be some type of attraction and if there is, I would say go for it. People will always have something to say, whether yuh good looking or ugly they will find some fault(but yuh know how we Trinis can be). At the end of the day, you have to make yourself happy and most of the time, de same people who bashing you are leading the most unhappy lives with their good looking SO. Also the part about ugly children -- if that child is constantly reassured by parents and family, they will grow up with a healthy dose of confidence and nothing will make them feel anyhow. I have some friends (ah don't want to say oooogly eh), who have such high confidence in themselves and believe that they are the best looking people and they have the sweetest personality and that makes them seem all the more beautiful to me (and dey have have sexy man and woman eh). For me the key words are "kind, understanding, loving" and another plus "good business sense" well this is someone to learn something from. It's very true as was stated before that we live in a superficial world but we don't have to fall into that trap

Sexelise said...

I guess if your friend took the time to be his friend there is some sort of attraction. but it's hard to get past that physical attraction for me.. I am very picky.. a man's laugh can turn me off.. But if she likes him she shouldn't be embarassed. it could be worse.. hottie is he like flavor flav ugly or worse?

Island Spice said...

LOL@Sexelise!! Flava Flav is the new standard of ULGY!! and look he had girls fighting over him!
ugh.

law said...

Hottie, please don't say he look like Flava Flav, oh gawd, NO! NO! NO! All what I said before, just went out de window if is so!

Hottie Hottie said...

Oh gorm. Nah, he not DAT bad. He does groom heself and dress decently and thing. But yuh kyah swing it no how. He not good looking. I know I dropping it like it hot but allyuh ask. Ah feeling bad just typing it but ah want to give allyuh a good idea of what we talking about.

Carnival Jumbie said...

NAH Flav is HORRIBLE, I could never lie down with dat!! I doh care how much money he is.
Law ...I hear you , it has a lot to do with your upbringing. Cause you could be gorgeous and have a complex. I have been told that I am a hot girl but yet when I was younger I was extremely self conscious and did not become socially adjusted till late teens.
And I will be quite honest and blunt with you when I say, part of the reason I was able to get into my own is because I realised that my looks 'got me places'. I literally started getting offered free stuff. Yuh know...long story, I feel like I posting on Hottie blog lolol. I will adress it over by me this week in more detail if you interested...

law said...

Hottie said: Nah, he not DAT bad. Phewwww!!! breathes a sigh of relief and wipes forehead)

Karabana said...

I was kinda in a situation like that when I was 16. I went out w a very good looking guy who was the epitome of a bad boy, lots of attraction there. When he broke my heart & we split, one of his friends from the group we used to hang out with asked me out. He was so sweet & harmless, the opposite of bad boy. Looks wise, I guess noone would turn around to catch a 2nd look, but he was certainly not ugly... he hadn't come in to his own yet, y'know, awkward teen boy. He also was into the rocker look, always wearing a leather jacket & black tshirt, which does nothing for pale light eyed fellas.
I once overheard a girl say when we were walking down the hall in school what is she doing with him? Grrrrr.....

But he just needed time to well, become a man, bc I tell ya, within a year, what a change in him, he became *such* a hottie! & as the yrs went on, he just got better looking. He developed confidence which made *him* realize how attractive he was. A lot of girls had their eye on him, & a newspaper photographer even caught him one day without his shirt mowing the lawn & that beefcake shot in the paper made girls look even more. LOL! I remember one friend calling me so shocked it was him.

But truthfully, for me, it's different with a grown adult who is not plain but unattractive. Ultimately, I have to be physically attracted to the guy, if I'm good w his looks but others aren't, f them! While looks are not #1, a face is not something you negotiate with, you look at it all the time, you can't be turned off by it, whereas you could learn to deal with say, a big belly... it's like that question would you rather an overweight guy or a guy with an ugly face, I say overweight, bc he can always lose weight.

katrice said...

Forget what other people think, but as long as she is attracted to him, more power to her! But it is important to be attracted to your partner. She have to roll over and look at his face every morning. LOL And pople don't usually get better looking with age. It's downhill from here! LOL

Hottie Hottie said...

Karabana, true eh! Unless he has money and can do plastic surgery? And aktrice yes, I agree, attraction is important.

Prettidolli said...

Mawnin' Hawttie Chile:

U-G-L-Y
He ain't got no alibi.......
He's uglayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
Uh hunh I said
He's uglayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!

I personally does LUV UP meh big, OLD, hardback, extremely wealthy, and accomplished UGLAAAAAY man. People does stare at we openmouthed all de time, but that just makes me carry orn & hug he up MORE BAD!
**MWAHHHHHHHHH BAYBEEEE MWAHHHH!**

De only thing a pretty boi can do for me is get genetically tested and then drop orf his best and most immaculate sample at the sperm bank for when Dolli feels is time fuh she to reproduce. De only tings pretty I want to see is he brains, personality, and OF COURSE he wallet!

Hawttie, tell yuh gyel that she'll be sipping champagne in style wid she ugly, well-to-do man while watching her critics suck down Canada Dry ale with a straw. WITHOUT ICE! :o Women are out there working multiple jobs like beasts of burden for pretty boi maintenance. Bullsheeeeeeeet! For de most part, pretty bois frighten ah hard wuk....Like Dad said to my brothers: Take your looks to de store and see what it buys you!

Tell she don't be shame..Come and live in de land of de UGLY! ;) Pahtee ovah herrrrrrrrre!

Karabana said...

LOL Prettid, whatever floats your boat gyrl!!!... but what's wrong w Canada Dry eh?
;-)

Prettidolli said...

Hey Karabana,

How yuh gyel? Nutting wrong wid Canada Dry cuz'I likey meh ginger ale. I'm just stating that the ones critcizing often have to suck salt b4 they can come out and judge someone else. I know yuh deh comfy in Tdot chile...LOL! Girl, I think I cornered de market on ugly men. I done wid pretty bois since high school days. Outside of meh Boris, Wentworth, and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, is STRAIGHT oogly man fuh moi...
If yuh funny, smart, and ah doofus
Call meh
If yuh name Rich Rufus
Call meh...........I ent keh one way!

Karabana said...

I have to say, I can't wait to meet you Prettidolli, you are a true Gem!
& smart - you get what you want... bc some gyrls are waiting on their gorgeous model like men to buy them a real gem, but all they getting is a cubic!

Prettidolli said...

Thank you Karabana for the compliments, they are very much appreciated. I feel the same way about u so RIGHT BACK @ CHA GIRLIE...LOL! It's ironic that u said gem b/c that's what meh dude does call me. He says he's de King and I right dey in he "crong"..lmao!
For me, life has always been about getting what one wants, but not steamrolling others in order to do so. I witnessed a recent situation in which colleagues of mine sat on MSN messenger and other IM counterparts and disparaged the professional reputation of another...Where did it get them, b/c they got FOUND OUT. Commess in the place! Karma is a b, as we can see from Hottie's 1st post...De gyul shortchanged she 1st landlord out of rent AND he's a cop. AND he's showing up to collect he $. It doesn't get any better than that! ;)

Meh so called ugly fellah has taught me MUCH about life & its principles. I would NEVER wait 4 any man to do ANYTHING for me...I am ALWAYS able to do 4 MYSELF 1st! God bless meh hombre feo yah!

So aftah alladat...Where's yuh blog gyul? I only seeing one set ah pretti pretti pictchahs! LOL!

Karabana said...

Thank you Prettid :-) my life quote is losely taken from Ms. Thing herself, Lauren Hill... "why be a hard rock when you can be a Gem?"
So, it's real sweet to meet other Gems in this world.
Like I just posted over on C.J. Diva's, knowing what men want, & figuring how it can fit with your plans is a necessary skill.
Just to be confusing (;-)), my blog is actually under my "other" identity, I didn't start one under Karabana, I really don't know why, if I can migrate it, I will!

http://mocagyrl.blog.com/

:-)

Prettidolli said...

"Why be a hard rock when you can be a Gem? So, it's real sweet to meet other Gems in this world."


Gems ALWAYS recognize gems. LOL! Perfecto! Magnifico! I was just watching Lauryn's performance on "Dave Chapelle's Block Party" DVD the other day. She's fantastic.

I shall visit...Leave out the welcome mat! ;)

Hottie Hottie said...

Allyuh want some privacy... :)

Prettidolli said...

LMAO.......Sorry Hottie! We getting carried 'wey.....

De gyel tell we not pon she blog. Go and find a room LOLOLOL!